Friday, March 5, 2010

What Does It Mean to be a Widow?

A father of the fatherless, and a judge (defender) of the widows, is God in his holy habitation. Psalm 68:5
Learn to do well; seek judgment, relieve the oppressed, judge (defend) the fatherless, plead for the widow.
Isaiah 1:17

Most of you that will read this devotion will not understand the position of the widow. The purpose in writing about the widow is to plead for her and try to explain the tremendous loss along with the overwhelming feelings of grief that accompanies the reality of death. Scripture says, “A judge of the widows, is God in his holy habitation.” The word judge means, “defender and advocate.” Here, in His holy habitation, God is her benefactor, guardian, Lord, master, teacher, advisor and counselor. What comfort that brings to the widow in her need of solace.
Numbness is a word I would like to use to explain the aftermath of shock in the passing of life. Some may ask themselves, “Did this really happen or am I dreaming?” “What just happened, am I going to be alright? What will I do now?” The immense feeling of loss begins to take hold and then unexpectedly everything seems to appear in part. Where you use to go to church together you now find yourself traveling to church alone. You use to save a seat for him but now your purse has taken that chair. Bedtime is hard now because you use to share the events of the day together and maybe even laugh a little but there’s no one there on his side, all is still.
Fixing the car, cleaning the garage, opening old boxes with memories of the past flood your heart and there are times you think, “I’ll never make it through this experience.” Everywhere you go now you probably go alone and if you are asked to accompany someone, you make up the third wheel. Nothing is ever the same and now you realize that you will have memories that he will never be a part of. For whatever reason, the mutual friends that you had together, stop calling or don’t call at all.  I am not sure why friends stop contacting you, it may be that they don’t know what to say and so they say nothing.
If you know a widow, please call her, spend time with her, and allow her to cry with you. It does take time to go through the grieving process of death. My Lord was so wonderful to me during this difficult time of my life. He walked me through the valley of the shadow of death and prepared for me a table in the wilderness where my cup was running over. I lingered in the book of Psalm for over a year and through that journey He comforted my soul and He changed me forever. 
One of the greatest gifts my loving Father allowed me to have, during my years of being a widow, was my dear family. How blessed I was to have them close to me so we could share the truths of the Word of God together and encourage each other daily. May I say the death of a spouse is extremely hard and the death of a parent has devastating effects upon the children as well. In remembering the widow, please don’t forget the children, the fatherless, their hearts are broken over the death of their father and they need your lovingkindness and understanding to help in time of need.
One last thought to leave you with. Take into consideration the life of the widow, and those that have lost their fathers, it is a great loss. Remember their pain especially those that have labored together for the cause of Christ. For a wife to loose her husband in ministry is quite overwhelming. The Lord is good to all, especially the widow and the fatherless. He will establish their borders and set in place their boundaries, (their limit) a safe and secure place to be. Proverbs 15:25

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